Checking in

Updated: Jul 17, 2020

Hey everybody,

Today i am so excited to be writing about this topic! I had such a liberating light bulb moment this afternoon that sparked this post.

The popular book i am invested in at the moment called 'The Help' has a signature quote on the front cover that reads 'change begins with a whisper'.


This resonates with me so much as i try and apply its essence to many aspects of my life. I believe it suggests if you are brave enough to reach out to somebody, you can spark a change in their life. Same goes for yourself, never hesitate to ask for help if you need it - things wont change unless you do.


Check on your strong friends, quiet friends and happy friends. Remind them that you are only ever a phone call away in this isolation period.


"Being a good friend doesn't mean you always have all the rights words to say. Sometimes it means you just know when to be a good listener " Katrina Mayer - an inspiring writer and motivational speaker. Genuinely showing that you care by checking in is such a powerful act. It makes you the most beautiful, respectful and caring friend you can be. Knowing that someone cares enough about you to check in can give someone strength and hope.


It is not about putting yourself absolutely last and offering yourself to exhaustion. You dont have to feel like your're leaping to dramatic conclusions. It is not an overbearing act that suffocates or pressures people. It is however, regularly reminding people that they matter and their challenges are valid. It is crucial we make time to look beyond our own busy lives and check on those we love and care about. Many people can go undiagnosed and find it hard to confide in someone, so we must give that opportunity to people even if they aren't willing to take it.


Think of a time someone has asked how you are genuinely going, you felt appreciated. In the grand scheme of things, what is the worst that could happen? they could simply be okay and most likely feel grateful to be remembered. Or they could open up and you can listen/ understand them. I hope you do know that checking in on people is ALWAYS worth it because sometimes you will do it in a moment they feel invisible or utterly alone.


Checking in can take 5 minutes out of your day to possibly make someone elses. A conversation has the power to change lives, you can start that conversation every day. Some way's you can check in are:

- a text

- phone call

- a conversation

- a hand written letter


We are living in unsettling circumstances right now and i encourage everybody to check in on three people after they read this. Your sentence can be so simple " hey ___, i was thinking of you and wanted to see how you are feeling lately? Always here for a chat" Offering your ear to listen or asking if they need anything can go such a long way.


R U OK day is a passionate non-profit campaign that encourage the following steps when checking in:

1. Ask 'Are you okay?'

2. Genuinely listen

3. Encourage action (remind them help is available and you are there)

4. Regularly check in


Look for the signs in your friends and family. If someone is suffering, it is not a cry for attention and they will appreciate your helping hand.

Some signs that you can notice are:

- persistent low moods or sadness

- excessive worry or anxieties

- isolating themselves or withdraw from friends

- low self esteem


REMINDER: If you are still concerned about somebodies welfare after checking in then you can always chat to a trusted adult or helpline.


Remember to look after your beautiful self and reciprocate all the love you give, to yourself too.

Things to practice self care can include:

- keeping in touch with your social network that make you happy

- do things you enjoy and take some time out

- be mindful



I am so proud of each and every person who read this post to better themselves and show up for the people around them.

Always remind yourself and others no problem is too big or too small,

(1800 55 1800 - kids helpline)

(13 11 14 - lifeline)


Love Jess


66 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All