Why genuinely loving yourself is so hard?

Updated: Jul 12, 2021

Happy Saturday everybody! I thought today i should give some perspective about the reality of loving yourself and why it can seem impossible. Its a rainy day in and i wanted to give everyone some hope and remind them they're never alone, ever.


1. There is an illusion that you must meet the needs of a standard in order to love yourself


How crazy is that? Imagine if we all had to look like a Victoria secret model just to be lovable. I want you to tell yourself right now that 'you are worthy of so much love for who you are in this very moment'. Because the person with your ideal life or look has struggled to love them self too. We all struggle with this at some point. I promise.

You may also feel like you need that certain friend, job, phone etc. to be lovable - Side note: this is false!


2. Sometimes we confuse 'self-care' with 'self love'


I like to think that we should do things like candlelit baths, face masks and yoga out of a self respect we have created. When we truly feel good about who we are and want to multiply that feeling.

Rather, than painting our nails in hope that we love our self once we are finished.



3. Conflict with others


Ever since i was young when i am fighting with somebody i have always felt 3x more self doubt than when my friendships are stable. I know this is probably the case for many of you. You may question everything you say, do, look like when in conflict with somebody. As humans, we tend to take everything said in an argument so sensitively which is 100% normal. But, you are always left with two really insecure people. Try your best to make amends for you and the other persons mental health <3


4. You may think it makes you 'narcissistic'


Self love is not egotistical. Its the complete opposite actually. Its one of the most selfless things we can develop as humans because when we love our self we are capable of so much. We can give more, do more and be more for the world that need us.


5. We are too often reminded of 'what we are not'


Media, toxic relationships, comparison and TV shows can all hinder our self love. Of course its going to be a healing process when we are suffocated by artificial beauty, income and lifestyle standards. But the moment you stop feeding into these ideals and start embracing your life, you will know. Things will change and you will feel lighter.


I truly know how difficult this journey is and you're genuinely amazing for being here today. Everything flows from your relationship with yourself.

So remember to hold on and keep going because your moment is coming xx


Love Jess

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